Today I received a scam email addressed to Mr./Mrs. Lang. Mr. Lang is my husband of 20 years, and he’s not serving in any capacity as my secretary or booking agent, so there’s no need to address both of us. Or perhaps, the author was confused? At this point I really don’t see where the confusion lies, especially in an online context where you can research just about any public figure.
I do not and have never identified as male. A quick google search would give you that answer from multiple sources. I go by D.L. Lang, not to sound more like a dude, but to differentiate myself from other well established people in the writing field who share my first and middle name. My real name is out there on Wikipedia and published by the press, and neither of them are traditionally male.
I was born a woman, and I still identify as a woman. I’ve been honored twice by our local city council for Women’s Month. I did the invocation for the 2019 Women’s March in Vallejo, performed in San Francisco for the Women’s Wave, and in Berkeley and Oakland for International Women’s Day. I’ve written many poems speaking on women’s issues. I exist in this world conscious of and having experienced a lot of the same struggles that other women experience in our culture.
Since I was four years old I’ve been plagued by other people misgendering me, thinking I was a boy. Back then I was a tom boy surrounded by mostly male friends, but it’s only other people who question my gender. I’m solid in who I am. My mother cut my wavy hair short for utilitarian reasons when I was in pre-school, and I later wore short hair again in Oklahoma which lead to a lot of bullying, so throughout most of my adult life, I’ve kept my hair fairly long.
I got my ears pierced and started wearing lipstick and nail polish again in my 40s. I even have a tattoo of the woman symbol ♀. But none of those things are exclusive to women. Any one of any gender can and should wear whatever they feel comfortable in as a form of self-expression. I look at my figure, and I do not see a man in the mirror, so that’s all on them. None of this has stopped people from calling me “Sir.” It happens on a regular basis for nearly four decades. At this point I really don’t know what to tell these people.
I don’t always wish to perform stereotypical femininity though by wearing a lot of make up and traditionally feminine clothing on a daily basis because frankly, it’s time consuming, so if one happens to call me “they” in recent years I have become comfortable with those pronouns as well, but I most often use the ones I grew up with, “she/her.” If I’m not going to be on stage, then comfort is my #1 priority with my appearance. If I dress up in a skirt or loud shirt on stage, that’s purely for building up my confidence around how I look in photos.
It’s lazy to write “fan mail” claiming to have read an author’s book, heaping praise for a work you’ve never bothered to explore, offering them unsolicited promotional services, and not even know basic facts about the author you’re interacting with. I can clearly see through these invitations to book clubs and so forth because of these regular factual errors. I won’t reply to an email, but I appreciate the entertaining blog fodder.
I have blocked 147 email addresses. Some have emailed me multiple times a week when I don’t reply. Y’all can stop emailing me about your online book club community of over 3,000 chatbots. I’m not interested. Period.
I recently received one pretending to be Terry Gross and another pretending to be Joe Hill. Joe Hill may be alive as you or me, but I’m pretty sure he isn’t wasting his time worrying about authors’ book review counts on corporate websites when there’s so many other problems in the world. If you’re asking me to pay you for exposure, no thanks. After 15 years I’m well exposed with over 75 news articles, numerous YouTube videos, nearly 200 publications, and I’m approaching 500 appearances.
I’m not looking for any pay for play opportunities. My money right now is going towards medications, healthcare and housing. I don’t have anything to spare to invest in other people’s get rich quick pyramid schemes made off the backs of indie authors nor waste my time gaming online review systems.
My poetry speaks for itself. Love it or hate it. Plenty is available for you to sample for free if you can’t afford a book, and my ebooks are priced lower than a gallon of gas, so if you want a discounted copy, download my ebooks instead of buying paperbacks. If you actually did read my books, leave reviews on review sites. I don’t need them in my inbox. At this point your glowing AI generated feedback doesn’t make any emotional impact upon me. Straight to spam.